Is it possible for people from different generations to understand each other? And what about those who feel like they don’t fit into any generation at all – what can they choose? What are their options?
We hear a lot about generational differences in all of the media that surround us, whether it’s podcasts, videos, movies, TV shows, books, music, memes. Generational differences are such a hot topic that it’s almost impossible to weigh in without falling into cliches. Even the idea of generational differences is a cliché and most of what people say about them is baseless, false, and even meaningless. No matter how much we enjoy the sport of poking fun at older and younger generations the precise boundaries between one generation and another are arbitrary and fuzzy. But it’s possible to make sense of generational conflicts and differences as long as we take everything we hear about them with a grain of salt. It’s true that people raised, say, between 1950 and 1970 were generally raised differently than people raised between 1990 and 2010. Expectations change over time. So do norms and what’s considered “common sense” (“common sense” being shorthand for “the popular biases of our time”). Ideas about parenting, for example, can change radically from one generation to another. It wasn’t that long ago that nearly all parents accepted that sometimes it was appropriate to beat their children. . . as long as they didn’t beat the young ‘uns too much. What was considered “too much” changed from generation to generation as well. There are still some parents who believe this but it’s no longer a mainstream opinion because the last few generations of parents have largely rejected it.
One idea that’s changed dramatically over the last seventy or so years is masculinity – in other words, the collection of behaviours and ideas and values that makes someone a man. What used to be considered a pretty mainstream idea of masculinity is now called “toxic masculinity”. Roughly speaking this version of masculinity focuses on aggression, competitiveness, power over others, the conflation of fear with respect, and other norms and behaviours that most people now find objectionable. Although this used to be the most dominant form of masculinity, it was never the only one. There have always been alternative ideas about what it means to be a man, what counts as masculine, and some of these have been more popular than toxic masculinity in certain communities, societies, and cultures. As newer generations increasingly reject toxic masculinity they’re turning to some of the alternatives that have been in circulation and adding to them to create visions of masculinity that are, in their view, more appropriate and less destructive. Yet many people, especially those from older generations, reject these alternatives as feminine. To them anything other than toxic masculinity isn’t masculinity at all.
Generational conflict – both in general and about masculinity in particular – are at the heart of Jonathan Tessier’s explosive new drama, Which Way, Millennial Man?. Tessier’s script, which won the 2023 Windsor-Essex Playwriting Contest, tells the story of Chris (played by Heath Camlis). Here we have a man who is both adrift and ambitious. He works a factory job that he hates, and is married to a successful woman named Laura (played by Nancy Lefebvre) who pays most of the bills and makes most of the decisions in their household. He doesn’t really know who he is yet and he feels like he’s running out of time to find out. He certainly wouldn’t claim to anyone that he’s masculine according to any current notion of what that means, though he desperately wants to be. What he wants most is to be taken seriously by his wife and the world. The path to that destination, he’s decided, is to write a true crime book about the father of a school shooter. As the story begins Chris has already spent weeks if not months researching school shootings and those who commit them.
Now he has the opportunity to interview Joe (played by Joey Ouellette), whose son Bradley killed 10 students at his school a decade ago before turning the gun on himself. Chris figures Joe can provide unique insights into that horrific event since he’s the one who raised the teenaged shooter. He also thinks he’s got a fresh angle: no one else has written a book focused on the experiences of a parent whose child has committed this kind of atrocity. From Joe’s perspective this is an opportunity of a different sort. He’s felt invisible and unheard for the last ten years. He feels that whenever anyone does give him a thought it’s to blame him for what his son did. Now someone actually wants to hear what he has to say so he’s determined to make the most of the opportunity.
It doesn’t take long for Joe’s influence, the power of his personality and his confident old-school masculinity, to exert pressure on Chris. As the interviewing process moves on Chris seems to be increasingly drawn in to Joe’s world and Joe’s way of thinking – in particular drawn to Joe as a role model of masculinity. Joe, to Chris’ mind, is clearly a man. No one would question that. Could it be possible for Chris to become a man as well? The allure of Joe’s toxic masculinity is almost too seductive for Chris to resist.
Tessier’s script introduces an alternative for Chris to consider in the form of Patrick (played by Ezra Poku-Christian). Patrick presents a completely different, more modern, idea of masculinity. He’s confident, self-assured, strong, but also compassionate and considerate, assertive without being aggressive. The version of masculinity that Patrick embodies is very old. It would be familiar to many cultures across centuries. As with toxic masculinity it involves power and projection of power – except in this form what matters is power over oneself rather than power over others.
The problem is that Joe poisons Chris against even considering the possibility of being the kind of person Patrick is by pointing out that Patrick seems to be having an affair with Laura, Chris’ wife. Evidence appears to be mounting. But is it evidence of an affair. . . or are there more innocent explanations?
At its core Which Way, Millennial Man? is the story of two relationships: one that’s falling apart and another that’s growing deeper. The relationship between Chris and Laura is already on the rocks in the very first scene. Laura is on her way up, succeeding in her career, and tired of feeling like Chris’ aimlessness is holding her back. She seems nearly ready to give up on the idea of rebuilding their relationship. But Chris believes there’s still hope for his marriage and is trying in his way to rekindle what he and Laura once had. Which of them is correct? The answer, unfortunately, will depend on Chris’ growing relationship with Joe.
Which Way, Millennial Man? by Jonathan Tessier will be performed at The Shadowbox Theatre (1501 Howard ave. – corner of Howard & Shepherd) February 21, 22, 27, 28; March 1, 6, 7 & 8. Showtime 8:00 PM (doors open 7:30). Tickets can be purchased for $25 through postproductionswindsor.ca or at the door (cash, debit, or credit card) if seats are still available. Starring Heath Camlis, Nancy Lefebvre, Joey Ouellette, and Ezra Poku-Christian. Directed by Fay Lynn. Produced by Michael K. Potter and Fay Lynn. Posters and programs designed by Kris Simic.
